Day off

Well I was out until 3am, not great but managed to drag my arse out of bed at 10.00 this morning to avoid the dreaded insomnia tonight.
I am not doing a bloody thing though today, it is total relax. I look around the house and there are things I should be doing like hoovering, cleaning the bathroom, the kitchen. But am I gonna?? Nope.

I am going to visit the sister at 12 then the gym at half one then Louise's at 3. So busy aft but by no means in a choreful way.

I can't wait to see my boy this evening. And the weekend is edging closer thank the lord.
I am managing to stick to my resolve (or the one Mr M gave me) to stop thinking about the wedding for a few weeks. I'm not really sure if it is a bit close to the wedding to be stopping thinking about it for a FEW weeks, but certainly this week I have closed down on it. I do however have a few things left to get before christmas, but Mr M thinks these can be done in Jan. I tell you Jan and Feb are going to be the busiest months going!

I am super excited as booked the dress fittings, got one on the 7th Jan one on the 13th Jan, and then the first DRESS fitting on the 3rd of Feb. The weekend of the Where's Wally hen night from work, that should be a great weekend! The thought of putting on "my" dress finally is making me jump up and down literally! It must be something of a first for a bride to try her actual dress on just a couple of weeks before the big day non? I can't wait. I have also been told in no uncertain terms that from the 13th Jan there is to be no more weight loss! The month leading up to the biggest day of my life these women think I can eat as normal!!! Are you shitting me...I will have all on to sleep, eat, leave the toilet! I can't  imagine how I will feel, which means the option of having a button up back are limited.But rather safe than a saggy dress on the day right?

The diet is soooooo on form!I am off to the gym this aft for more army style arm blitzing! It will be a right gun show come wday!

Time!

As in, I never seem to have any to blog! Sorry!
I have good news though, I have my dress! Finally, and costing way more than I wanted to spend on a dress, or car for that matter but still it will be worth it. I have to tell myself that to help me sleep.

It is being made by Suzanne Neville and is a mix of 3 dresses thrown into one with my own take on it too. So really I dont know what it will look like when it is finished, but I have every faith it will be bloody gorgeous!

I am so relieved that part is done now,yes really. It was fun initially but the worry of not picking the right one, and then regretting it. Or picking one because it is cheaper and will do, sleepless nights a plenty!

So yes, it is expensive and yes it is going to mean cutting back in other wedding areas but you know what, for that one day,it will be worth it to live my dream of being a bride/wife exactly the way I had hoped. Feeling and looking a million dollars. That feeling I got, it really is priceless.

P.S. Diet going well too. Davids house sale going through, everything looking up apart from peoples lack of interest in the wedding. That is for another day though. Got to go write my first RMW bride entry! Woo!

Dress hunt

Well I am a little bit worried now, I found 2 more dresses I liked on Thurs but have since sort of gone off them a bit. I am going back with mum and the sis in tow to show her what they look like...the veil is stupendously gorgeous and swayed me more than the dresses which I think is a bad sign.

So now I have gone and booked a further 3 apps to try on at pretty big shops with a lot of designers I have yet to try. However one has got 30 Paloma Blanca dresses so I am beyond hoepful for that one. I have got one on saturday, one on mon, one on weds, and the final one next sat. So....if I have not got one by then...I am just going to wear my mums net curtains fashioned into a toga. Seriously.
I am hopeful I will find one but at the same time being a curvy gal, a lot of the dresses in the past 2 shops were for like size 8's! No way can I guess what they would look like if they fitted when I can't get them past my calves!!!!! No shop lady I can't make a decision based on what I think they will look like when they fit! This is the  biggest decision I have to make....like probably ever! You know, apart from whether to donate my organs or not or which house to buy to live in forever (jury still out on that organ one rather selfishly).

So there we have it, I am glad to see however that all this dress dilemma stuff is making the weeks fly by to apps and therefore time is going quickly...I am far too keen for it to be christmas already! I am like already thinking what chistmas decoration scheme to go for...I know I know. And also looking forward to stews, soups and veg rather than salads and meat etc.

That is all, it is my first night on solo call tomorrow so I am a tad nervous and just hope I have a good team on and good anaesthetist. Fingers crossed wont be out all night so I wont look like a dead bride on sat in the shop!

50/50

I am today mostly feeling really sorry for myself. I have a friend who is supposed to be one of the best ones, and she is really bringing me down. I sort of want to cut her out, but I am godmother to her son and she is doing a reading at our wedding. But, she seems to be getting really good at pissing me off, a lot.
I can normally handle her life plans changing every week, from getting this house to getting that dream house, to building their own house, to staying where they are. To splitting up to having a baby, to splitting up and moving out with the new baby. To getting back together then splitting up again. To then saying she will never move back in, to moving back in and getting pregnant again prior to moving in, 2 weeks after the latest getting back together. To then getting a lot of money from an accident, and using it to start up a buisness with supposedly 8000 pounds turnover a month allowing her not to work again, to not mentioning this money ever again. Then when I ask, they have got the money but are no longer going into buisness, but have found another forever house they are going to re-do,extend and live forever in. And there was me thinking it was odd that she was skint a few months ago to her getting new wardrobes for the family and re-doing the rented house all up! Mmmmhh not such a surprise now. Then her other half is now entering another new venture with a multimillionaire which will bring a grand a month extra so she is going to be able to work less following the next baby. To then perhaps not working at all if it all kicks off, and her being his PA to manage accounts. To then they have put an offer in on a house, and are waiting for his house to sell and this house couple are happy to wait until they can buy it. Oh and they will get married and she will have one of the best diamonds you can get and etc etc etc. Until I cant breath!

So thats a quick picture of how things are, and other than being really excited if I have any probs to talk about, she is rather not interested in anything. Not the wedding, other than she will be glad to drink and smoke again and she will try and keep on a few extra pounds so I am slimmer than her on my big day (said in jest but I bet she means it) and it will be a night away for them. Super supportive. She asks me how dresses are going whilst looking at her phone, cos she cant have a conversation without looking at it.
And I just dont buy it! This whole, never been happier shit when about 4 times in the space of a year she has said he is  not the person she wants him to be and will never change, she doesnt like how he is as a parent etc... why is she now all of a sudden happy and having another kid! My prediction is, in another year we will have gone through all this again. TWICE.
Now, if she was a proper proper best friend, I could be honest with her and tell her, but I just dont think she will accept it. So what the hell do I do!??? I am stuck.

Anway the 50//50 title is because that was the shitty half, this will be the good half.
I tried on wedding dresses and it was fab! I think I have found the one, but cant say too much cos David reads this! But got one more app tomorrow and then i think i will leave it at that if cant find any. Tomorrow is a big designer shop though so probably more dear! And more choice! Eeek!

I must...

...collect myself! I have just booked my first appoinment to try on bridal frockage! I know, me who has been putting it off and putting it off and thinking I will never get a dress to match my budget/figure/dreams. Well I have booked an app, and it's tomorrow! I am so excited! My mum can come and cry too, hopefully or not if they are no good!
The lady on the phone was lovely and really helpful and juggled things around to fit me in and give me enough time, then reassured me that sizes would be bigger because bridal dresses are smaller fitting so not to panic!
And, because they are having a show and sale on sat that I can't get to cos of ruddy work, she said they will try and sort me out with a discount anyway if I find the dress I want. Yeah, like that will happen on the first go!
Ahhh, I have also booked 2 further appointments, one on Mon and one on Sat 23rd. I don't think my mum is here on the 23rd but she might be. And anyway, Liz can come and my mum can come back and see any I like. The one on Mon is at the award winning shop that has a collection of dresses that I had a look at online and they look stunning!

So I am officially get my wedding on! I am going to be pro-active and follow the real brides advice and make a chart/list of things to sort in order of priority and such like. I am also going to stop being such a mizzer about the planning and just get on with it and plan and be simple about it. I am going to stop comparing myself to every woman on every wedding blog and feeling sub-standard (not least because of my lacking skills in blogging). I am just going to man up!

Oh and I have been back to the gym yest and worked my butt off, I also have avoided going today. I know I am bad. But I am going tomorrow and I am seeing Alexander in the morning for a little bit and to take him swimming I think. But apart from that, I am trying on brides dresses. And catching up with my bezzler in the evening for tea. The dress thing might be just the motivation I need to get back on the diet track and gym it up. I booked up both in with the trainer in 2 weeks and buff bodies will be ours!!

So thats it! Oh and I have a follower!? Thanks so much but I fear you will be uber bored reading my posts haha...they are mostly garb! xx